sunday night

oh i wish i had a river i could skate away on

my father, sister (new nickname: CORDOVT: constipated obsessive rabbit displaying ominous violent tendencies. and she's proud of it.) and i went to kinokuniya as he had a $110 office voucher. i hungrily got 6 books. the last j.d. salinger book i havent read, wise children and love both by angela carter, the adventures of huckleberry finn, the last of the mohicans, and the unbearable lightness of being. mmmmmmmmm. to sit down with a stomach full of warm cookies in a snug armchair reading the days and nights away.

as we drove back a car intercepted the yellow box that i had the right of way to, and being impatient and curse-happy (as opposed to trigger-happy) i called him a pompous fat ass. and when i asked my father for directions he said 'okay follow that pompous fat ash.'

i had a dream that i killed a pedestrian in a car accident. it wasn't like a morbid fantasy like imagining your own funeral. it was the complete opposite because it was sickening and couldn't have been anything else. an inevitable feeling and then it happened and then you want to bury your face in your hands. it scares me that it could happen any day. driving is mentally unhealthy. it makes me think of death nearly every second. but i saw a light robin egg-blue vespa today with someone on it with orang-utan colored hair and a red backpack zooming off, and it looked incredible.

it's my mother's birthday. her mother gave her a box of cotton buds and she loves it. actually people's birthdays don't just concern them but also their parents and especially their mothers. this is really logical. wouldn't it be sad if no one celebrated the day people had their children? and celebrated the day people were born when they have no recollection of it except that they get presents and it feels nice?????

LOVE the power rangers song and how it's so crazy-rock. it's all jumping on the sofa with my brother all over again.